Saturday, December 6, 2008

Time and Snow

A very light dusting of snow on the roads turned into "black ice" that was so slick that the wind started to turn my car sideways. Four trucks slid off the highway - going uphill. You'd think that after the first one was visible, the others would have slowed down. Huh.

I finally turned around, halfway to my destination, deriding myself for my lack of fortitude, reasoning that the roads would be clearer in a couple hours anyway, but it just wasn't worth it. I felt repsonsible to the people who I was meeting, but at what expense?

So what's the point I'm making? How many times was judgement a part of my thought process? Judgement, guilt, projecting onto other people what I think their motivations were. Concern for how others would judge me.

I am so grateful for the awareness of this judgement, so that there is the possibility of releasing it. I have moved from Unconscious Incompetence, to Conscious Incompetence. I'm still incompetent in the complete release of these thoughts, evidenced by the tightness in my solar plexus, but now I have the opportunity.

"Time runs from present to past." To be continued.

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