Monday, June 30, 2014

Are You At A Breaking Point?

A tree that cannot bend
will crack in the wind.

The hard and stiff will be broken;
the soft and supple will prevail.
 ~Lao Tsu, Tao te Ching

When the world seems to put us in a untenable and impossible situation between a rock and a hard place, how can you bend instead of break?

We get it in our heads that things have to be a certain way, that there is a right and a wrong way. We believe that our choices are limited, or that our values will be violated by an unavoidable situation.

Is it true? What is the hard and stiff here?
Is it the rule? Or our interpretation?
Is it what is expected of us? Or our ability to imagine other possibilities?
Is it really that absolute?

How can you find an alternative that lets go of one thing and the degree and extreme to which you thought you needed.

How can you negotiate with expections, others OR your own? Sometimes we can look at expectations, especially our own, and see that they are the rock or the hard place. Expectations are the source of disappointment and pain.

We create expectations based on the beliefs and values that we develop over time. As we approach each boulder in the road, each fork of decision, is it really that black-and-white? What if we allow our thinking to bend, to become supple to the situation, the moment?

What if we are flexible with our own expectations? What if there is more than one answer to the question, more than one option in the mix?

Knowing that there are options allows us to bend and continue to grow. Without options, we are broken by our own thinking and lack of imagination.

Monday, June 16, 2014

What's Holding You Back? It Might Surprise You...

In a recent workshop I presented exploring the Upper Limit Problems that can sabotage our success, the question was asked, “Isn’t looking for the negative counterintuitive to the Law of Attraction’s focus on the positive for manifesting what we want?”

What a great question! Larry, when I heard that, it reminded me of something I said to my doctor about tests and procedures designed to catch issues early. I said, “Why go looking for trouble?” Of course, my cynical attitude toward the allopathic practices was rearing its head in the conversation, but it’s not a bad comparison to the search for Upper Limit Problems that might hold us back from our potential for success.

The Upper Limit Problems are behaviors that we create after we experience a higher level of success than we have given ourselves permission for. Doesn’t that sound crazy? But it’s true: we have an internal thermostat for how much success we allow ourselves to experience. Much of this Limiting Thinking is formed in our early childhood, amazingly. It could be one simple thing that we heard someone say. It could be someone’s behavior or example that influenced us.

Is it negative to look for this limiting thinking? Let’s look at it from another angle: if we don’t know what thinking is controlling us, how are we going to change our behavior? Without awareness, what hope do we have of creating a new way of thinking – a thinking upgrade?

Larry, awareness is the first step to positive change. And sometimes we need help to become aware. Give me a call when you are ready to go to a level of success that you’ve been dreaming of.

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